Write@Home
Winter 2015

General

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Have you ever thought that you have an identity and it could be hidden by how you were raised? Either matriarchal or patriarchal, we are born to be part of a society. The concept usually is misunderstood and the most interesting of it, is the fact that it could affect how we behave and how we interact with others. We happen to think that these concepts are not going to make us more prepotent or introvert in certain way. Also, it depends on each individual self emotional traces or temperament. Understanding better could place us into one of those definitions. Patriarchal means that men are the head of a community or ethnicity. On the other hands matriarchal leadership is based on women decisions into a community or households. I am going to talk about those cultures or way of thinking that usually are in conflict.

First, Mosuo culture is matriarchal culture where women lead their household affairs. They pass down the inheritance from one generation to other, but it is allowed just from woman to woman. Also, they have secret encounters with their mates during the night, next day early in the morning the males leave the females’ house without being noticed. Usually the children do not know who their fathers are. Women keep the control and the power in the community and decision making is women’s affair. Males use to help with other duties such as building and fishing, but nothing related with economy or raising children. In contrast, Indian culture has a strong patriarchal trait. It means that the men are over the women thoughts and they apparently have more rights than women. Things have been changing but it is still a big gap between males and females. Things like child marriage, or literacy because they are not allowed to study. There has been a big difference and unfair treat of women from centuries.

Second, in the past there were many civilizations where the men were the rulers. The Israelites were a society more patriarchal because women’s opinions were not by men while making decisions. Even when they did not bear males child the heritance got lost. Its culture got focused more in to have male child rather than females. Fathers in this culture used to celebrate and prepare food to show their proud of having a baby boy. Because of this difference women used to be treated unfairly. They suffered many abuses such as the acceptance of being part polygamy that became very common. Also, if they husbands disagreed with, how their wives wear clothes or behave, they could get the divorce. However, there were examples where men patriarchal culture was overruled cleverly. It is the history of Jezebel the Ahab’s wife. She used her intelligence to interfere in her husband decisions. Her husband was so sad because his neighbor did not want to sell his vineyard. Jezebel said her husband, aren’t you the king of Israel? He replied, yes sure! Then she decided to get that property using her cunningness. She used her husband ring to give an order to falsely accuse the owner of the vineyard that her husband wanted. Finally, she got the land because she hired fake witnesses to swear that that man was a delinquent. The man was executed, and Ahab got what he had wished.

In conclusion, there are many cultures where those different traits are in us. We are part of society where we act the way we are taught. It could be how my mother or father sowed in me their traits, patriarchal or matriarchal. Believe it or not, it makes me understand why I am so. I was raised by my Mom most of the time. I would not believe, but after thinking about it, I realized that was I raised by matriarchal. After getting married the trend was the same as my house. My wife tried to be the leader of home because I allowed. I learned that I must be the head of my house, but I know too that my wife needs a man to support her and keep them safe. We learned to share opinions, discuss ideas, and work together. We are joined to form a family without egoism or special interest. We were made to be better through the time. Improving the family traits and fixing the wrong. All together we are the future of this new world. We think more in building family as a team rather to look for my own interest as an individual. It does not matter if we came from matriarchal or patriarchal society.