Parenthood

I would have never thought I was going to write one day about parenting. Even though ‘Mom’ was a word that wasn’t in my vocabulary or my foreseeable future, I have a big smile on my face just thinking about it. This is how much your mind can change after you become a mom. I’m sure every woman has a different story to tell, but at the end the conclusion is probably the same: being a mom is the best experience any woman can have.

From my own perspective I can say it hasn’t always been easy, life can be hard, especially when you have a child.

Three years ago, I was living in Cuba. My husband and I were married in 2015. He is Canadian and we met while I was working at a resort and he was on vacation. Our relationship has been a journey of sorts, as can be expected when living in two different countries. Despite the difficulties we faced, having our son was worth all the hardship. In May 2016, I was at my parent’s house waiting for my husband to finish the sponsorship process so I could finally move to Canada and start our life together. Travelling was overwhelming and getting expensive for my husband to afford every month. What I didn’t know was that on June 3rd my whole life was going to change, as that’s when I found out I was pregnant. Being pregnant was the last thing on my mind, but it was happening and the happiness from that moment filled my heart and the hearts of my family. It was the best feeling.

However, after you are pregnant you want to make sure you have all the conditions for that little human being, but in my position living in Cuba didn’t help me a lot. My husband and I were always sure of how much we wanted that baby. I had a wonderful pregnancy beside the fact my husband was still travelling,

The nine months of pregnancy went by and finally on January 30th I gave birth to our son. He weighed 8 pounds and 1 ounce and was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. There are no words in this world to explain what a mother feels the first time you hear his cry, and the first time you kiss his little hand. The feeling is life changing. From that moment on, your love for that little person just continues to grow with every passing second. It’s a combination of love and fear and worry but the love outweighs all.

I became a different person after I had my son. In that moment, I was at my parent’s house and every doubt I had was answered by them. My husband was very supportive, my son is his third child, and he was an expert in parenting. On the other side was me, who had no clue what I was doing but I was there, and I wanted to do everything for that baby. No one was better than me for him, that was my thinking in that moment. It didn’t matter what it was, I was the only person who could do it right, I was protecting that precious piece of me that took so long to make. The first months were difficult, breastfeeding every second of the day, three hours wasn’t right, pumping, long hours without sleep, sometimes the whole night. I never wanted to train him to sleep, as soon as I felt him crying, I picked him up from the crib ; there was no way I was going to let him cry.

My family was incredible with me and my son and they helped me with everything they could. Finally, the sponsorship process was finished, and I was able to come to Canada to a new life with my husband and my son. We were able to start our life together as we always wanted. My family was very sad, and it was very hard to leave them. My son was little, and I needed them more than ever. I was waiting for that moment for 2 years and now, I was finally making my dream come true.

The first days in Canada were hard, starting over in any place can be hard, but I was still adapting to be a mom. My son was fine, but he didn’t want to eat, and he went through his first year throwing up every meal I cooked for him. My husband was working during the day and I was without sleep until my son turned two. At that point, he started sleeping better. I tried to start some school courses and I was interested in working from home, but had trouble accomplishing anything. Working wasn’t a choice for me . I feared leaving him with anyone else besides my husband. I could never do it. I dedicated myself to him for the first 2 years of his life. My whole life had stopped, my plans were put on the back burner. At first, I couldn’t learn how to drive, I couldn’t go anywhere without my husband or his family taking me. My profession was very important to me, but my son was the most important.

Up to this moment if someone asked me what it feels like to be a mom I would answer without a doubt, “It’s the best feeling in the world”!

In spite of each concern or issue you can go through when you decide to have a baby, you will always see the light at the end of tunnel, your baby will grow and you will be a mom for the rest of your life . You will be full of love even though at one moment you might have wondered if you could make it. One day you will tell yourself I did it! And it was the best.

As far as my experience goes, my son is three years old now, he is growing and learning very fast. I just started working at my first job here in Canada. My grandmother is here from Cuba and is helping care for him while I’m not home. Starting to work again was a challenge for me. It was very hard at the beginning, but I know it was time for me to come to work and he’s in the best hands. I got my driver's license and I finished a few online courses like Accounting, Business and Marketing and I’m currently in English as well.

My advice is always stay firm, strong and, always be sure of each decision you take with your child because the person you are and the person you become as an individual, is the person he’s going to be when he grows up.